Day 30-Change Of Heart
Did you have a change of heart about something or someone this year? Who/What was it? Why?
I used to assume and believe that success was getting everything you want, or at least doing everything right. Therefore, I frequently beat myself about a lot of failures, more often the ones involving relationships or actions and personal character. But in the past year, I've come to view success in a different light; that it's not about whether everything goes according to plan, but how well you can adapt to the curveballs and what you can learn from it.
From a broad view, a majority will argue that my past roommate fiasco was an epic failure; there was an overflowing amount of stress, and we're no longer in each other's lives. That being said, it did teach me a lot expectations, as well as how to live gracefully in an environment that is filled with so much tension and negativity. Personally, she taught me a lot about attitude and how it impacts your life and the people that you surround yourself with. So no, I don't regret choosing to live with her. I wish that I had done some things differently, but I think us living together pointed me in the direction that I needed to go in so that I could work through my own issues.
I was single for most of the year. but did go out on a few dates. Most of them were awkward and I didn't sense that anything was there. The one that I did feel totally comfortable with never called again afterward. In general, I was terrified of opening up to any man for a fear of what he might think of me. Things got even more complicated after one of the worst nights I've had in college. But it helped me grow so much as a person and a woman, as well as see past some of the lies and misconceptions about dating. I'm planning on doing a stand-alone post about that real soon But again, just because I didn't get exactly what I wanted, but that doesn't mean I didn't get anything.
Overall, I view life in a much more positive way because of it. In the last few months, I have felt the weight of what feels like the entire world get taken off my shoulders. I now know what is in my control and what isn't. And that in any situation, if I can't do anything about the outcome, the least I can do is try to look at it in a different way. Here's to seeing out that plays out in 2013!