May 27, 2013

Unexpected Hiatus

Earlier in the month, I had planned on taking part in a blog carnival called "Every Day in May," similar to doing Reverb12 back in December. It started off nicely, but my schedule started getting a little crazy with finals and it being the end of the semester. On that note, my emotions were running very high and there were times where I wanted to blog, yet could not find the "right" words  relating to the topic. I'd have all these thoughts regarding the prompt for the day, yet I didn't know how to bring them all together in a way that made sense. There was so much going on that I could barely find the time to sit down and actually do it.  

But things are a bit calmer now; I'm at home for the next couple of weeks, enjoying some downtime with friends and family. The slow pace of life in the suburbs is always an adjustment,  but I welcome it. I've been reading for pleasure, I'm exercising more, and just soaking it all in. Life is good, and God is good. 

One of my goals this summer is not just to write more, but to write with a deeper sense of honesty and vulnerability. I always have ideas and thoughts swimming around in my brain, yet only half of them ever get articulated in some way because I'm terrified of putting it out in the open. A month or so I posted a status on this blog's Facebook page where I said "the more I write, the more I realize that I want to be a 'hallelujah-somebody-finally-said-it' kind of writer. And not that I'll be the first person to write or talk about it, but definitely someone that's willing to do so." 

That's the only way to ever be truly successful as a writer, in my opinion: to be willing to talk about the things and issues that are closest to your heart without the constant fear of criticism or hatred. While athletes say "leave it on the field," as a writer I find myself saying "leave it on the page." 

It feels so good to be doing what feels natural to me: reading, writing, being in community. I would still like to continue blogging about things relating to "Every Day in May" as well as continue with Love In Action, a series that I started but unfortunately lost momentum with soon after. The school year may have come to an end, but I have a feeling that this is the start of something that is just beginning.

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