Surprised, Much?

Day 5-Surprise

I will not hide my tastes or aversions. I will so trust that what is deep is holy, if we follow the truth, it will bring us out safe at last. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Think of a time when you didn’t think you were capable of doing something, but then surprised yourself.  How will you surprise yourself this week?

When I read this topic for the first time, I scratched my head trying to think of something to write about. There are so many things that have happened and so many things that I have done, where I have come out of it thinking Did I really just do/say that? to where it's almost impossible to pick just one. But then I read it again, and that it dawned on me: my entire life has been filled to the brim with endless surprises; it has been that way since the day I was born, and probably will be until the day that I die. 

When I was an infant, the doctors were extremely skeptical that I would survive. At that time, most babies who were born as prematurely as I was didn't live very long. It took about four months worth of hospital stays, tubes of medicine and plenty of kicking and screaming, but I did come home a happy and healthy little girl. 

A year later, I was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy. My parents were given a list of physical tasks that I supposedly would never be able to do. The main ones took a little motivation from the arrival of my brother, but I did it. I went on to play various sports, win a gold medal and graduate from high school. 

Nearly twenty years after that, not many people thought I would go away to college. They expected me to stick around locally, or a small private school at best. But I had bigger dreams than that; I would be damned if I allowed physicality, or even finances to keep me from doing what I felt was right. So despite the worries from family members (I even heard through the grapevine that some of them had made a bet on how long it be before I came home), I packed my bags and took off for Iowa. Needless to say, when I came back for a semester break, those that had expressed concern politely apologized. 

It's funny how the power of faith and the human spirit can take precedence over a medical diagnosis. In other words, I may have a handicap in regards to scientific studies and the human body, but that does not mean I have to allow those "limits" to forge the path that I should take; it does not determine who I will be or what I will do. In my eyes, they're just words and nothing else. 


I also believe in the power of confidence, and how it can propel you to overcome things that maybe you thought you couldn't. It honestly isn't natural for me though; I have to actually do something, maybe multiple times over, before I can become completely comfortable with it. But the whole reason I've accomplished so much is because of my ability to feel secure with whatever it is I'm doing. 


However, it's not just the physical aspects of myself that tend to throw me for a loop; it is partially emotional as well. There are times where I can be feisty and aggressive, and I'm becoming less shy about calling it as I see it. I may appear to be a tiny little furball, but I have the strength and determination of a tiger. That will all speak for itself at some point or another. 


I'm not saying that I'm a people pleaser, but I don't deny that I get a kick out of proving people wrong; there have been moments where I've wanted to stand up on anything ridiculously tall and say "look at me now!" Or at the very least go up to someone that ever had doubts (believe me, there are some) and say "I told you so." 


I think that I often surprise a lot people, especially when it comes to my family. Then again, perhaps that's a good thing; it means that I'm not always predictable and I'm not as easy to read as some might believe.


I have come a long way to get to where I am today. But that doesn't mean I'm done yet...not by a long shot.